I just wanted to say, first of all, a quick hello to you all – Hello! – and thank you all for your time, your follows, your comments, your likes and the budding relationships I am privileged to be forming with many of you.
Funny how it should be obvious, right? We all know that we should treat ourselves as we would our best friend. But treating your partner better than you would a stranger, how many of us consciously strive to always do this? The first we do because we are stuck with ourselves from the day we are first conceived until the day we are finally laid to rest, and we have to make that relationship count. But the other, this is a person we have chosen to be with, who has the choice to be elsewhere yet chooses to be with us in return, and yet frequently they find themselves the source of our anger, our pent up frustrations with the world and the daily challenges it throws our way or our scapegoats. Or worse, we treat them as if they’re barely even there. We save the best of us for our social selves, and the worst and the most mundane for our home selves and, in turn, our intimate partners. Continue reading “Treating Your Partner Better Than You Would A Stranger”
While I admit I have moments where I feel a little lost without it, no longer having regular cellular service at the cabin is starting to grow on me more and more. My boyfriend has a cabin on the lake, which we spend as many weekends at as we can in the summer, and it happens to be just close enough to town that we managed to get a somewhat spotty but generally constant signal, until this winter. Our provider apparently had some dealings with another service provider whose client base dominates the area, and with the overload on their towers now, we are lucky if we can get past a log in screen once every couple of days. And I’m kind of happy about it actually, but when you’re gone every weekend for months, cabin time starts to become part of reality, and I know there are going to be times coming up where I’m going to need to be on the grid, so to speak; but this weekend wasn’t one of them.
I had mentioned before how being disconnected and out on an island alone together made us focus more on each other and talk more together, and this weekend was more of the same. Two plus years (going on our third summer) is not the longest time, but even after two years we’re still learning about each other and ways to be a better couple, and this past weekend’s unintended lesson was in reciprocity. Continue reading “Improving my Relationship: A Long and Arduous Lesson in Reciprocity”
I’m sitting here, the Monday night after a three day holiday weekend, trying once more to decide what I should post next, but just not feeling what I have already written up, and my brain too tired to brainstorm any new ideas. So I don’t really know where I’m going from here, but I’ll know when I get there. You see, the plan was Friday after work to pack up myself and the mutt with just enough to get us through to Saturday evening, and meet up with the man for a quick overnight trip to the cabin to get it opened for the season. Being Ms. Prepared I packed two large bags with enough changes of clothing and gear for every type of inclement weather, and brought along enough dog food to get my buddy through a week, in case of emergencies. Which turned out to be highly fortunate. Continue reading “But This Wasn’t Part of My Plan – Unexpected Life Lessons”
“30 is the new 20” “40 is the new 30″… great. These trendy and trite little catchphrases are representative of far more than they would appear at first blush. What do they even really mean? Well, for the limited purpose of this post, it means that traditional societal norms have shifted over the years – that the things that were expected of you in your 20s are now acceptable and more the norm to be expected in your 30s, and your 30s for your 40s in turn. And what does any of this have to do with dating? It means that over the last several years there has been a shift in our collective conscience where it is now acceptable for people to be settling down, committing, getting married, having children later in life, or to not do any of it ever. So the good and the bad news for you is that the world we occupy is currently populated with more adult singles than it has been since the advent of marriage. Continue reading “Successfully Navigating Adulthood, But Can’t Get a Date? 24 things you may be doing that are killing your chances of success”